sample

POSSIBLE TITLES:

THE PERFECT HER

READY TO GET MARRIED

 

Story/Screenplay By

Greg O. Afamah

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright (c) 2017 Greg O. Afamah

Registered with NCC

This screenplay may not be used or reproduced without the express written permission of the author.

 

greafma@gmail.com

+234-80-253-62660

 

 

 

 

 

AN ALARM CLOCK GOES OFF.

FADE FROM BLACK

INT. FRANK/CHINASSA’S BEDROOM – MORNING (SPLIT SCREEN)

Both Frank and Chinassa stir in their sleep as their alarm clocks ring loudly. After a few minutes they both reach out and slam their alarm clocks off. Covers fling back and they both attempt to get up.

INT. FRANK’S APARTMENT – BEDROOM

FRANK OBI, early 30’s, handsome and tall, gets out of bed in his very stylish bedroom and shuffles to his bathroom.

INT. CHINASSA’S APARTMENT – BEDROOM

CHINASSA ONYALI, early 30’s, beautiful, rolls over out of the bed and makes her way to her bathroom.

INT. FRANK’S APARTMENT – BEDROOM

Frank comes out of the bathroom, dressed in a very nice suit. He fixes his tie and heads out the room.

INT. CHINASSA’S APARTMENT – BEDROOM

Chinassa emerges from her bathroom in a sexy, but professional business skirt suit. She heads out of her room.

INT. FRANK’S APARTMENT – DINING

Frank sits at his dining table, reading the newspaper, eating a bowl of cereal and talking on his ear piece.

FRANK

(into phone)

So what I’m going to do is merge the two deals together and give them an offer.

INT. CHINASSA’S APARTMENT – KITCHEN

Chinassa puts files and papers in her briefcase, while fixing herself a lunch. Chinassa then pours beverage into a thermos. She drops some cubes of sugar into it while on her phone.

CHINASSA

(into phone)

That’s fine. So let’s go ahead and close this account by the end of this week.

Chinassa hangs up her cell phone and dials another number.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

(into phone)

Cynthia, can you move my two o’clock appointment to three. (beat) Thanks, I’ll be at the office shortly.

Chinassa hangs up the phone, grabs her briefcase and her lunch and walks out the kitchen. After a few seconds, she returns and grabs her thermos and then heads back out.

EXT. CHINASSA’S APARTMENT – DRIVEWAY

Chinassa, on her phone again, jumps into her black Range Rover.

CHINASSA

(into phone)

Cynthia, get Mr. Ade on the phone and conference him in.

Chinassa backs out of the driveway and drives down the street.

INT. FRANK’S APARTMENT – DINING

Frank is still reading the newspaper.

FRANK

(into phone)

Well, I don’t want to have to go all the way to Abuja to get these contracts signed.

Just then, Frank’s best friend and business partner, UCHE ORIZU, a very handsome suit wearing guy, slithers into the dining and helps himself to a cup of beverage.

FRANK (CONT’D)

(into phone)

I don’t care what it takes, I want everything finalized by this afternoon.

After getting his beverage, Uche takes a seat opposite Frank and fixes himself a bowl of cereal.

FRANK (CONT’D)

(into phone)

Alright, let’s get this settled.

Frank takes his earpiece out of his ear and folds down his newspaper to see Uche stuffing his face with cereal.

FRANK

How was your date last night?

UCHE

(unconvincing)

Oh, it was cool.

FRANK

What was wrong with her?

UCHE

Nothing.

FRANK

Come on, it must have been something. What was it?

UCHE

Alright, one of her eyes was bigger than the other.

Frank tries to hold back his laughter.

UCHE

Her right eye was bigger than the left one.

FRANK

Are you serious?

UCHE

Yes, man. And don’t laugh.

Frank has almost fallen out of his chair from laughing.

FRANK

You know what your problem is? You’re picky as hell. Every woman you meet, you find something wrong with her.

UCHE

That’s not true.

FRANK

What about Valentina?

UCHE

What about her?

FRANK

You stopped dating her because her nose was a little big.

UCHE

A little big? Frank, that girl’s nose covers her entire face.

Frank gets up and puts his dishes in the sink.

FRANK

All I’m saying is, if you keep getting rid of these women for ridiculous reasons, you’ll never find the perfect one.

UCHE

How can you find something that doesn’t exist?

Uche follows Frank and puts his dishes in the sink.

EXT. FRANK’S APARTMENT/EXT. STREET

Frank and Uche get into Uche’s Mercedes and drive down the street.

EXT. CHINASSA’S OFFICE BUILDING

Chinassa get’s off her car talking on her phone as she grabs some files from her assistant Cynthia.

CYNTHIA

There’s someone waiting for you in your office.

CHINASSA

Thank you, Cynthia. And find out what time that conference call is.

CYNTHIA

Yes, ma’am.

Chinassa proceeds into her office.

INT. CHINASSA’S OFFICE

Chinassa enters her office only to find her best friend, NNENNA OPARA sitting behind her desk. Chinassa gets off her phone.

CHINASSA

Oh, Nnenna, hi?

NNENNA

Hi.

Chinassa puts her stuff down on her desk and Nnenna gets up and sits in another chair. Chinassa sits behind her desk.

CHINASSA

So, what’s new?

NNENNA

Girl, let me tell you about my date last night.

CHINASSA

Oh, Lord. Go ahead.

NNENNA

First of all, let me start off by saying that there are no good men.

CHINASSA

You always start off saying that.

Chinassa laughs.

CHINASSA

Okay, continue.

NNENNA

So, me and this guy go out to eat and everything is fine, until he tells me about his wife.

CHINASSA

His wife?

NNENNA

Yes, his wife. And his three wonderful children.

CHINASSA

He has kids?

NNENNA

Of course he has kids. He’s married isn’t he?

Chinassa can’t hold her laughter in.

NNENNA (CONT’D)

Chinassa, this is not funny.

CHINASSA

Girl, yes it is.

NNENNA

Okay. How about you? When is the last time you went out on a date?

CHINASSA

You know I’m not dating anymore.

NNENNA

Oh, yeah that’s right. Waiting for the perfect man.

CHINASSA

Exactly.

NNENNA

You’ll be waiting forever, because no man is perfect.

CHINASSA

You have to have faith.

NNENNA

So what is your definition of the perfect man?

Chinassa takes a deep breath, sits back in her chair and closes her eyes.

INT. FRANK’S OFFICE

Frank sits behind his desk with his earpiece in his ear as he shoots baskets with his wastebasket while Uche rebounds.

FRANK

We have so many dinner meetings next month.

UCHE

I never understood that.

FRANK

Understood what?

UCHE

Why is it when it comes to closing deals, it’s always done over dinner?

Just then, their boss, Mr. Dibua walks in.

  1. DIBUA

Hey, how’s my best team?

FRANK

Everything is good, Mr. Dibua.

  1. DIBUA

How are the projections looking for the meeting?

UCHE

We were just talking about those and the numbers are very high. They’re looking good.

  1. DIBUA

That’s what I like to hear. Keep up the good work.

Mr. Dibua leaves.

UCHE

Man, we got to get things ready for this meeting.

FRANK

Yeah, we do. But let me ask you something.

UCHE

What’s up?

FRANK

How can you keep dating women after women, and not want to settle down?

UCHE

Easy. Being with one woman is not natural.

FRANK

Oh, here we go again.

UCHE

All I’m saying is, men were meant to spread their genes all over.

Frank laughs and tosses one of his basketballs made of rough papers at Uche.

INT. CHINASSA’S OFFICE – NIGHT

It’s dark and empty. Chinassa is the only one left in her office as she works under a small desk lamp. She looks through files and documents, highlighting. She looks at her cell phone.

CHINASSA

Wow, it’s late.

Chinassa starts packing up her things, just as her phone rings. She picks it up.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

(into phone)

Chinassa Onyali.

NNENNA (V.O.)

Still at the office?

CHINASSA

(into phone)

Yeah, I guess time just got away from me.

NNENNA (V.O.)

Well, go home and get some rest.

CHINASSA

(into phone)

I am.

(beat)

How was your date?

NNENNA (V.O.)

I had to cut my date short.

CHINASSA

(into phone)

Let me guess, he had a wife too.

NNENNA (V.O.)

Girl, not only did he have a wife, but he had a girlfriend, who’s pregnant.

CHINASSA

(into phone)

Wow! Now that’s a new one.

NNENNA (V.O.)

Yeah, and now I’m going home to burn all my good panties because I’m done dating for awhile.

Chinassa laughs.

NNENNA (V.O.)

Call me when you get home.

CHINASSA

(into phone)

I will.

Chinassa hangs up her office phone, turns off her lamp and walks out of her office.

INT. FRANK’S OFFICE – NIGHT

Frank types away on his computer. He looks down at his watch and jumps up. He begins stuffing papers and files in his briefcase just as Uche sticks his head in the door.

UCHE

Man, are you ready?

FRANK

I didn’t realize how late it was.

UCHE

Come on, now. I got this babe waiting on me.

FRANK

I’m sorry, man. I just got caught up working.

UCHE

It’s cool.

Frank follows Uche out the office, turning the lights out.

INT. CHINASSA’S BEDROOM

Chinassa walks into her room dragging like a zombie. She steps out of heels and takes off her suit jacket. She tosses everything on her bed and goes into her bathroom.

INT. FRANK’S BEDROOM

Frank walks into his room and drops his briefcase on the floor, unties his tie and throws his suit jacket on a chair.

He sits on the edge of his bed and takes his shoes off and then goes into his bathroom.

INT. CHINASSA’S BEDROOM

Chinassa walks out of her bathroom in pajamas and climbs in her bed. She sighs and then pulls out files from her bag, curls up and goes to work.

INT. FRANK’S BEDROOM

Frank comes out of his bathroom in pajamas, gets into his bed, grabs the remote, curls up and begins channel surfing.

INT. FRANK’S OFFICE BUILDING – CONFERENCE ROOM – MORNING

A meeting has just let out and a room full of high powered suit wearing business executives, including Chinassa stand around talking. Mr. Dibua, followed by Frank come in the conference room and walk over to Chinassa.

  1. DIBUA

Ms. Onyali, I would like to introduce you to one of our top executive, Frank Obi.

Frank and Chinassa shakes hands.

FRANK

Nice to meet you, Ms. Onyali.

CHINASSA

Chinassa. And it’s nice to meet you too.

  1. DIBUA

The two of you have been chosen from your companies to head up the team.

Frank smiles at Chinassa.

FRANK

I heard you’re a good player.

  1. DIBUA

Chinassa here is the best. You’re lucky to be working with her, Frank.

CHINASSA

Thank you, Mr. Dibua. I’m looking forward to getting started.

  1. DIBUA

Well, you two have a lot of work ahead of you, so I’m going to leave you to it.

Mr. Dibua pats Frank on the back and joins a group of business men talking off to the side.

CHINASSA

So, you’ve heard about me?

FRANK

No, I was lying.

Chinassa smiles .

CHINASSA

Well, I haven’t heard of you either.

FRANK

So, it looks like we have a lot to talk about.

CHINASSA

Yes we do. Including our plans for this merger and strategies on how to close this deal.

FRANK

I love the way you talk, Ms. Onyali.

CHINASSA

Thank you, Mr. Obi.

FRANK

So, how about you join me for dinner tonight and we can discuss things a little further?

CHINASSA

We’ll be there.

FRANK

Alright, I’ll see you tonight. I’ll call you with details.

Frank and Chinassa shake hands and Chinassa walks out of the conference room, just as Uche walks in. Him and Frank stare out the glass window.

UCHE

What’s up? Who was that?

FRANK

That was Chinassa Onyali. My new partner on this Abuja deal.

UCHE

That’s the corporate head Mr. Dibua was talking about?

FRANK

Yes.

UCHE

That’s who you get to have late night dinners and work long hours with?

FRANK

Yes.

Uche gives Frank a serious look and walks out the conference room. Frank smiles confidently to himself.

INT. RESTARAUNT BATHROOM – EVENING

Chinassa stands in the mirror fixing her hair and making sure her suit looks good.

INT. RESTARAUNT – TABLE

Frank sits at the table while a server stands over him.

FRANK

Can we just have two waters for now?

The server walks away just as Chinassa returns to the table.

FRANK (CONT’D)

I went ahead and ordered a water for you.

CHINASSA

Thank you.

FRANK

So, how long have you been over at Johnson & Gables?

CHINASSA

Johnson & Gables? I see you did a little research.

FRANK

Just a little. Only the name of the company, I swear.

Chinassa smiles .

CHINASSA

I was hired right out of NYSC.

FRANK

Impressive.

Chinassa blushes.

FRANK

So, I guess they knew what they were doing, pairing us.

CHINASSA

I guess so. We have a huge work load on us though. Dealing with a multinational company has to be dealt with cautiously.

Chinassa smiles and pulls out a pile of papers from her briefcase.

CHINASSA

So, let’s get started.

INT. RESTARAUNT – TABLE – A FEW HOURS LATER

Chinassa has her suit jacket off and her sleeves rolled up as their server comes by and clears the empty plates. Frank returns from the bathroom and takes his seat.

FRANK

So where were we?

CHINASSA

Actually, I think we covered a lot of ground, tonight.

FRANK

Yeah, we did get through a lot.

CHINASSA

I think we’re done for the night.

Chinassa begins cleaning up the papers and putting them away.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

I’ll be sure to mail you copies of everything from today.

FRANK

Great.

(beat)

So, Ms. Onyali, can I ask you a personal question?

CHINASSA

Sure.

FRANK

How come you aren’t dating anyone?

CHINASSA

What makes you think I’m not dating someone?

FRANK

Well, it seems like you work just as many hours as I do and I don’t have the time to date anyone.

CHINASSA

How do you know I don’t have someone waiting at home for me?

FRANK

Okay… what’s his name?

Chinassa tries to think quickly.

CHINASSA

Okay, so there’s no one waiting for me.

FRANK

Sounds nice though, doesn’t it?

CHINASSA

It does. So same question for you, Mr. Obi.

FRANK

I’m waiting.

CHINASSA

For what?

FRANK

I don’t know. But I’ll know when I meet her.

Frank gives Chinassa a stare and she stares back at him.

INT. CHINASSA’S OFFICE BUILDING – MORNING

Chinassa is seen waving and smiling at everyone. She approaches Cynthia’s desk.

CHINASSA

Good morning, Cynthia. You look nice today.

CYNTHIA

(shocked)

Good morning, Ms. Onyali and thank you. Here are your messages.

Cynthia hands Chinassa a small stack of papers.

CHINASSA

Thank you.

INT. CHINASSA’S OFFICE

Chinassa walks in sorting through her messages.

NNENNA

So, I haven’t heard from you in two days?

Chinassa jumps a little and looks up to find Nnenna sitting behind her desk.

CHINASSA

Nnenna you scared me. What are you doing here?

NNENNA

Well, since you don’t know how to call, I’m just checking to make sure you’re alive.

CHINASSA

Well as you can see, I’m fine.

NNENNA

I see alright. So, how was your date the other night?

CHINASSA

It wasn’t a date. It was a business dinner.

NNENNA

Just the same. How was it?

Chinassa walks over to Nnenna and pulls her out of her chair and sits down.

CHINASSA

It was productive. We got a lot of work done.

NNENNA

Forget the work. What does he look like?

CHINASSA

Does it matter.

NNENNA

I can see he’s put a smile on your face.

CHINASSA

Has not.

NNENNA

Whatever. So, what’s the deal, how long do you have to work with him?

CHINASSA

Well, we’ve been paired up to close this Abuja deal. So, it could take months, even longer.

NNENNA

So, you’ll be spending a lot of time with him?

CHINASSA

Yeah.

Chinassa begins typing on her computer while Nnenna sits there silently.

NNENNA

So, do you like him?

CHINASSA

Bye Nnenna.

NNENNA

What?

CHINASSA

Go back to your office.

NNENNA

Come on, do you?

CHINASSA

Don’t you have work to do?

NNENNA

Okay one more thing.

CHINASSA

Yes.

NNENNA

Next time you go out with him, make sure he isn’t married or has a girlfriend or kids or anything like that.

CHINASSA

And if he does?

NNENNA

Then I’ve probably dated him.

Chinassa and Nnenna laugh. Chinassa then picks up her phone.

INT. FRANK’S OFFICE

Frank stands behind his desk, while Uche is in front of him.

UCHE

So all you two talked about was business?

FRANK

Yeah.

UCHE

I’m disappointed in you, Frankie.

FRANK

Don’t call me Frankie and what are you talking about?

UCHE

So, are you attracted to her?

FRANK

Of course I am.

Just then, Frank’s phone rings.

FRANK (CONT’D)

Man, I’ll get up with you later.

UCHE

Alright.

As Uche leaves, Frank sits in his chair and picks up his phone.

FRANK

(into phone)

Frank Obi.

(beat)

Ms. Onyali, nice to hear from you.

Frank sits back in his chair smiling.

FRANK (CONT’D)

(into phone)

I agree, we do need to meet again. How about my apartment?(beat) Sounds good. I’ll even cook.(beat) Don’t laugh, I can cook.(beat) I’ll see you tonight.

Frank hangs up his phone.

INT. CHINASSA’S OFFICE

Chinassa hangs her phone up, while Nnenna watches her grinning.

NNENNA

Look at you, making dates.

CHINASSA

It’s not a date.

NNENNA

And did I hear correctly, you’re going to his place and he’s cooking for you?

CHINASSA

He insisted.

NNENNA

Mixing business with pleasure.

CHINASSA

Trust me, this is all business, no pleasure.

NNENNA

If you say so.

Chinassa sits back in her chair and stares into space while Nnenna keeps an eye on her.

INT. FRANK’S APARTMENT – KITCHEN – NIGHT

Steam arises from the pots sitting on Frank’s stove. Frank stirs something in one pot. He then cuts up some vegetables on the counter and then tosses them in another pot. Frank’s table is set for two with candles.

Just then, the doorbell rings and Frank snatches his apron off, fixes himself up and goes to the door. A few seconds later, Frank comes back in followed by Uche.

FRANK

What are you doing here?

UCHE

Smells like you were expecting someone else.

FRANK

You know Chinassa is coming over here.

Uche sneaks some fried chicken from the counter.

UCHE

Wow, you’re making vegetable stew?

FRANK

Is there something I can help you with, Uche?

UCHE

Oh, yeah. I need those files from the Berkley account.

FRANK

What for?

Uche continues to steal food.

UCHE

While you’re working on this Abuja deal with Chinassa I’m taking over the Berkley account.

FRANK

Alright, hold on. And stop eating my food.

Frank runs into the other room.

UCHE

(to himself)

He even got dressed up.

Frank returns with a folder and hands it to Uche.

FRANK

Here you go.

UCHE

Thanks.

FRANK

Alright, time to go.

Frank starts to push Uche out of the kitchen, who resists.

FRANK

Man, get the hell out of here.

Uche laughs as Frank continues to push him just as the doorbell rings. Frank lets go of Uche and rushes to the door.

Frank returns with Chinassa. Uche sGbenga as Frank stands behind Chinassa giving Uche an evil stare.

UCHE

You must be Chinassa. I’m Uche Orizu and–

FRANK

He was just leaving.

CHINASSA

Nice to meet you, Uche.

UCHE

Frank, can’t I stay and–

FRANK

Goodbye, Uche. And thank you very much for dropping by.

Uche sees that Frank really wants him to go.

UCHE

Alright, I’m leaving. I’ll see you at the office tomorrow, Frank.

Uche finally leaves.

FRANK

Sorry about that.

CHINASSA

That’s okay. He seems nice.

They hear the door slam.

Frank takes Chinassa’s jacket off for her.

FRANK

Well, come on in. Make yourself at home.

CHINASSA

You have a really nice place, Mr. Obi.

FRANK

Well in my place, it’s Frank.

Frank leads Chinassa to the dining room table.

CHINASSA

Wow, Frank. I’m impressed.

FRANK

Well, have a seat and dinner will be served.

Frank pulls out Chinassa’s chair and she sits down. Frank pours two glasses of wine.

CHINASSA

This is my favorite wine.

FRANK

I knew that.

CHINASSA

No you didn’t.

FRANK

You’re right, I didn’t. I’ll be right back.

Frank sets the bottle down and goes into the kitchen. He prepares two plates and returns to the table. He sets a plate down in front of Chinassa.

CHINASSA

And where did you learn to cook?

FRANK

My mother taught me.

CHINASSA

Pretty good.

Frank holds up his glass and Chinassa does the same.

FRANK

I want to make a toast.

(beat)

To a successful business partnership.

CHINASSA

That’s it?

FRANK

For now.

Frank takes a sip of his wine. Chinassa does the same after she smiles.

INT. FRANK’S APARTMENT – LIVING ROOM – LATER

Frank and Chinassa are sprawled out across Frank’s living room floor both still drinking wine and laughing. Papers and files are spread out.

CHINASSA

Hold on. I’m getting there.

FRANK

Alright, take your time.

CHINASSA

Now, you have all this space and empty bedrooms, why are you alone? Why is Frank Obi still a bachelor?

FRANK

I chose to be.

CHINASSA

Really?

FRANK

Yeah.

CHINASSA

And why is that?

Frank sets his glass down and scoots closer to Chinassa.

FRANK

Because I’m waiting.

CHINASSA

Yeah, you mentioned that at dinner the other night. What is it that you’re actually waiting for?

FRANK

For her.

CHINASSA

Her who?

FRANK

The perfect her.

CHINASSA

And you think such a woman exists?

FRANK

I know she does.

CHINASSA

And how do you know that?

Chinassa sets her glass down and scoots even closer to Frank and now they’re sitting close enough to kiss. After a few seconds of staring at each other, both their cell phones go off, breaking the mood. They both tear away from each other and find their cell phones.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

Do you mind if I step into your kitchen? This is kind of important.

FRANK

No, go right ahead. Take your time.

Chinassa gets up and goes into the kitchen. As soon as she leaves, Frank answers his phone.

FRANK (CONT’D)

(into phone)

Uche, what the hell do you want?

INT. KITCHEN/LIVING ROOM – SAME TIME

INTERCUT AS NEEDED

Chinassa stands in Frank’s dark kitchen and answers her phone, trying to whisper, as Frank stays in the living room, talking on his quietly.

CHINASSA

(into phone)

Nnenna, this better be good. What is it?

FRANK

(into phone)

Man, what do you want?

CHINASSA

No, I’m in his kitchen.

FRANK

No, she’s in my kitchen.

CHINASSA

No, girl, he really can cook.

FRANK

No, we were drinking wine.

CHINASSA

Yes, dinner was great.

FRANK

No, we talked a little about business.

CHINASSA

We didn’t talk too much about business.

FRANK

Do I like her?

CHINASSA

Do I like him?

Frank looks towards the kitchen to make sure Chinassa was out of ear shot.

FRANK

Come on now, Uche. This is just business.

Chinassa peeks towards the living room to make sure Frank wasn’t listening in.

CHINASSA

Girl, now you know this is just business.

FRANK

Look, man, I’ll talk to you tomorrow.

CHINASSA

Girl, I will call you tomorrow.

FRANK

What? Yes, she still has her clothes on!

CHINASSA

Excuse me? Yes, I still have my clothes on!

Chinassa hangs up her phone and returns to the living room, just as Frank hangs up his.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

That was my best friend checking up on me.

FRANK

Yeah, mine too.

They stand there for an awkward second.

CHINASSA

Well, it’s kind of late. I think I better head home.

FRANK

Oh, right, of course. It is pretty late.

Chinassa kneels down to gather up all the files and papers on the floor. Frank kneels down with her.

FRANK (CONT’D)

Here, let me help you with those.

Once all the papers are gathered, Frank and Chinassa both stand up and are facing each other and are pretty close. They stare at each other for a beat.

CHINASSA

My keys.

FRANK

Your what?

CHINASSA

My keys. Have you seen my keys?

Frank snaps out of his trance and starts looking around. He finds her keys under the couch and hands them to her. They stare at each other once again.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

Thank you.

FRANK

You’re welcome.

Chinassa starts to walk out and Frank follows her.

EXT. FRANK’S DRIVEWAY/EXT. STREET – NIGHT

Frank walks Chinassa outside and they stand next to her car.

FRANK

Guess we didn’t get much work done, huh?

CHINASSA

No, we didn’t.

They both look away.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

Why don’t you come to my office tomorrow afternoon. That way we can go over a business plan.

Frank walks a little closer to Chinassa and almost pins her up against her car. He goes in for a kiss and Chinassa turns her head away. Frank looks surprised and rejected.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

Tomorrow. Lunch. My office.

FRANK

I’ll be there.

CHINASSA

Goodnight, Frank.

FRANK

Goodnight, Chinassa.

Chinassa gets in her car as Frank backs away watching, looking defeated. Chinassa backs out of the driveway and drives off down the street.

INT. CHINASSA’S OFFICE – AFTERNOON

Chinassa and Frank have finally gotten down to business. There are charts and graphs all set up. Frank and Chinassa stand in front of the charts as Chinassa points things out. Frank stares at her trying his hardest to pay attention.

CHINASSA

So, if we follow this plan here, our cost value will exceed our financial overhead. And then–

Before Chinassa could finish her sentence, Frank grabs her by the waist and kisses her. After a beat, Nnenna knocks once on the door, enters and catches them kissing.

NNENNA

Oh, I’m sorry!

Frank and Chinassa quickly tear away from each other, embarrassed. Nnenna continues into the office grinning.

NNENNA (CONT’D)

I didn’t mean to interrupt, but since I did, what am I interrupting?

FRANK

I’m going to excuse myself, and, uh, go to the, uh…

NNENNA

Yeah, you do that. The uh… is right around the corner.

Frank quickly leaves the office and Nnenna focuses back on Chinassa, who is trying to straighten herself out and hide her smile.

NNENNA (CONT’D)

And what was that?

Chinassa goes and sits at her desk as if nothing happened.

CHINASSA

What was what?

NNENNA

That kiss I just walked in on.

CHINASSA

That was nothing.

NNENNA

It didn’t look like nothing to me. It looked like a whole lot of something.

CHINASSA

Nnenna.

NNENNA

Did that kiss continue from last night?

(gasps)

Did you sleep with him?

CHINASSA

No, I didn’t sleep with him.(beat) That’s the first time we’ve kissed.

NNENNA

Well, what happened with, this is just “business?”

CHINASSA

It is.

NNENNA

Girl, him sticking his tongue down your throat has nothing to do with “business,” or am I the one in the wrong business?!!!

CHINASSA

Could you lower your voice, Nnenna, please? I don’t need the whole office knowing my business.

NNENNA

Well, then you need to take your “business” somewhere else.

Chinassa doesn’t respond. She just sighs and sits back in her chair. Nnenna leans over her desk.

NNENNA (CONT’D)

You like him, don’t you?

CHINASSA

No.

Nnenna gives her a look like she knows she’s lying but doesn’t say anything else. Just then, Frank finally returns. He peeks his head around the corner.

FRANK

Is it safe for me to come in?

NNENNA

It sure is. In fact, I don’t believe that we’ve met.

FRANK

No we haven’t.

Frank comes into the office and holds his hand out for Nnenna to shake.

FRANK (CONT’D)

I’m Frank Obi.

NNENNA

Nnenna Opara.

FRANK

Well, it’s nice to meet you Nnenna.

NNENNA

Likewise, Frank.

Nnenna turns to Chinassa and gives her a glare. Frank stands off to the side to let the women talk.

NNENNA (CONT’D)

You’ll call me tonight?

CHINASSA

Yes.

NNENNA

And we’ll talk about all this?

CHINASSA

Yes, we will.

NNENNA

Just don’t do anything else.

CHINASSA

I won’t. Bye Nnenna.

Nnenna turns to walk out of the office.

NNENNA

Goodbye, Frank.

FRANK

Bye, Nnenna.

Nnenna leaves. Frank gives Chinassa a smile as she throws her head back and lets out a sigh of relief.

EXT. FRANK & CHINASSA’S HOUSE – AFTERNOON

TITLE OVER: EIGHT MONTHS LATER

INT. MASTER BEDROOM

The room has very little furniture but a lot of boxes. Nnenna helps Chinassa unpack her clothes and some other things.

NNENNA

I cannot believe you two are moving in together.

CHINASSA

Well, believe it.

NNENNA

I mean, you guys have only been dating for a few months. And you’re getting married next month.

Chinassa takes some clothes and hangs them up in the huge walk in closet.

CHINASSA

I know, but–

NNENNA

Are you sure that you’re ready for all this?

CHINASSA

Nnenna, you know me. You know I would never make a decision like this unless I was sure.

NNENNA

You’re right, I do know you. And I’ve never seen you like this; so excited.

Chinassa goes back to unpacking as Nnenna watches her worried.

INT. FRANK & CHINASSA’S HOUSE – KITCHEN

Frank and Uche are taking a break from packing and are drinking water.

UCHE

You two are moving way too fast for me.

FRANK

What has Chinassa and I getting married have to do with you?

UCHE

I’m not ready yet. First you tell me you two are moving in together and now you’re getting married.

FRANK

Yeah, and?

UCHE

You guys just sprung this on me. Didn’t even give me a chance to think about it.

FRANK

I don’t understand you, Uche. Is it your marriage we’re talking about or mine?

UCHE

I’m serious. It’s not until after you get married, before you find out all her dirty little secrets.

FRANK

Look, man, there is nothing that isn’t perfect about this woman.

Uche tosses his water bottle and gets another one.

INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT

Frank and Chinassa sit in the middle of their new empty living room surrounded by boxes, cuddling.

CHINASSA

I can’t wait to start decorating. I have no idea what kind of patterns I want to use.

FRANK

Don’t worry, baby. Whatever you choose will look great.

They share a small kiss.

FRANK

Oh, don’t forget, we have a meeting with our lawyers tomorrow to sign the prenup agreements.

CHINASSA

So, you’re really okay with this?

FRANK

Why wouldn’t I be?

CHINASSA

Sometimes men get offended if the idea comes from the woman feeling the woman thinks they’re a gold digger.

FRANK

Do you think I’m a gold digger?

CHINASSA

As soon as I met you.

Frank shoots a look at Chinassa.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

I’m just joking.

CHINASSA

Look, I have to protect myself just as much as you do. I think it’s in our best interest.

FRANK

You’re right.

CHINASSA

I love you, Frank.

FRANK

I love you too, Chinassa.

They engage in an intimate kiss.

INT. LAWYERS OFFICE – MORNING

Frank and Chinassa, along with their lawyers sit at a conference table. Frank and his lawyer, Gbenga Lampejo sit across from Chinassa and her lawyer, Anita Afe. Gbenga and Anita exchange documents.

GBENGA

Nice to see you again, Anita.

ANITA

Can’t say the same to you.

CHINASSA

You two know each other?

ANITA

Gbenga and I were on the same divorce case last month.

GBENGA

My client won.

ANITA

Your client was an adulterer.

GBENGA

The Judge didn’t seem to care.

ANITA

You know what?

FRANK

  • Whoa, excuse me? Can we get back to the meeting at hand.

CHINASSA

Sorry I asked.

Anita slides the papers to Chinassa and she looks them over, while Gbenga hands a copy of the same papers to Frank.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

Everything looks good to me.

FRANK

Me too. Where do I sign?

GBENGA

Before you sign, is there anything you want to add?

CHINASSA

What do you mean?

GBENGA

Well, it’s a growing trend for men and women to put rules… laws if you will, in a prenup agreement.

FRANK

Are you serious?

ANITA

He’s right though. You wouldn’t believe some of the things people put in a prenup.

CHINASSA

I don’t think that’ll be necessary.

FRANK

Wait a minute. This could be interesting.

CHINASSA

You can’t be for real.

FRANK

Gbenga, does the spouse have to abide by the rules given to them in a prenup.

GBENGA

If it’s in the prenup, yes they do.

CHINASSA

This is silly.

ANITA

As silly as it sounds, it is bounded by law. And any rule that’s broken could be grounds for a divorce.

Chinassa begins laughing.

CHINASSA

You’re joking?

FRANK

Come on, this could be fun.

CHINASSA

There is nothing fun about making rules for each other to follow.

FRANK

Yes it is. You know when you blow dry you’re hair at six o’clock in the morning? I would put in a prenup that you couldn’t do that until eight o’clock.

CHINASSA

Oh, really?

FRANK

I know there’s something you want me to do that you could put in there.

Chinassa thinks for a moment.

CHINASSA

Alright, let’s do it.

ANITA

Why don’t you two take these documents home and look them over and we’ll all meet again.

INT. BEDROOM – NIGHT

Frank and Chinassa lay across their bed both concentrating as they add things to their prenup.

Chinassa stops and thinks for a moment, then continues writing. Frank scribbles out something and then begins writing again.

CHINASSA

Okay, what you got?

Frank sits up.

FRANK

No, you go first.

CHINASSA

Okay, fine. You have to put the toilet seat down after every time you use it.

Frank laughs.

FRANK

Alright, that’s cool. I can handle that.

CHINASSA

You couldn’t before the rule?

FRANK

But now I have to.

CHINASSA

Now it’s your turn.

FRANK

Okay, I get a massage whenever I feel like it.

CHINASSA

(smiles )

I see you’re playing dirty. I’ll agree to that.

FRANK

Alright, what you got next?

CHINASSA

Okay, no matter what, whoever cooks, the other one has to do the dishes.

FRANK

No matter what?

CHINASSA

No matter what.

FRANK

I can dig that. Now, I have one more.

CHINASSA

Let’s see what you got.

FRANK

Under no circumstances am I to be bothered when I’m watching the game.

CHINASSA

What game?

FRANK

Football.

CHINASSA

Fine, you can have your stupid football games.

FRANK

See, that wasn’t bad at all.

CHINASSA

Actually, it was kind of fun.

FRANK

Enough of the paperwork.

Frank grabs Chinassa and starts kissing her.

INT. CHINASSA’S OFFICE – MORNING

Chinassa types away on her computer when Nnenna sticks her head in and knocks lightly on the door.

NNENNA

Hey girl, what you up to?

CHINASSA

Trying to finish up these quotes for the Richards account.

NNENNA (CONT’D)

So how’d the meeting go yesterday with the lawyers?

CHINASSA

It went well. We didn’t sign any papers yet.

NNENNA

You guys change your minds about the prenup?

CHINASSA

No, we’re still going through with the agreement. They’re just not finished.

NNENNA

What do you mean?

CHINASSA

Well, we found out that we can add things to it. You know, like rules the other one has to abide by.

NNENNA

Yeah, I heard of that.

CHINASSA

Yeah, well, last night, Frank and I added some things to ours.

NNENNA

Like what?

CHINASSA

Just small stuff like, Frank has to put the toilet seat down and I have to give him a massage whenever he wants one.

NNENNA

That’s cute.

CHINASSA

I think we’re done, though.

NNENNA

You know this whole prenup thing is alien to us in Nigeria. You sure you guys know what you’re doing?

CHINASSA

It may be strange but I have to protect wealth from being stolen by a man, and you’d be surprised some Nigerians do prenup.

INT. FRANK’S OFFICE – SAME TIME

Frank and Uche are on their daily task and talking.

UCHE

So, what’s this about adding stuff?

FRANK

Oh, Chinassa and I are putting in rules that the other has to follow.

UCHE

Man, do you know what I would put in a prenup for my wife?

FRANK

As if you’d ever get married.

UCHE

True. But if that were me, every night she would have to–

Just then, Mr. Dibua comes in.

  1. DIBUA

Mr. Orizu, I need to talk to Frank for a moment.

UCHE

Yes, sir. I’ll call you later, Frank.

Uche leaves.

FRANK

What’s going on Mr. Dibua?

  1. DIBUA

Look, I know you just moved and your getting things together for your wedding, but we still have a deal to close.

FRANK

Yeah I know, Mr. Dibua. Chinassa and I have been a little preoccupied with everything.

  1. DIBUA

I understand, but this is a major account for both of you. This could change both of your careers.

FRANK

I understand.

  1. DIBUA

Just wanted to make sure you were on top of your game.

FRANK

I am.

  1. DIBUA

Alright, I’ll check back in with you.

FRANK

Thank you, sir.

Mr. Dibua walks out of the office.

INT. LAWYERS OFFICE – MORNING

Frank and Chinassa sit with their lawyers again. Anita and Gbenga pass around the agreements and both Chinassa and Frank sign all the papers.

ANITA

So, did you two put everything in that you wanted?

CHINASSA

I think so.

GBENGA

So, by law, as long as the two of you agree, you are able to change anything in the agreement, up until you get married.

FRANK

So, if we wanted to add or change something, we have until the wedding?

GBENGA

That’s right.

ANITA

Alright, well I think we have everything we need.

GBENGA

We’ll get these agreements copied and send a set back to you.

Everyone stands up to leave.

CHINASSA

Good. Glad that’s settled.

FRANK

Yup. No more rules.

Frank and Chinassa smile at each other and playfully shake hands.

INT. BEDROOM – AFTERNOON

It’s finally furnished. Chinassa is in the closet getting things in order.

FRANK (O.S.)

Hey, babe, come downstairs.

Chinassa walks out of the closet and heads out the bedroom.

INT. DINING – MOMENTS LATER

Frank has lunch waiting on the dining table.

CHINASSA

Oh, what’s this?

FRANK

This is lunch.

CHINASSA

That’s sweet, baby.

FRANK

I know you’ve been working hard making this house beautiful, so I thought you could take a break and join me.

CHINASSA

I would love to.

Frank and Chinassa sit down at the table and begin eating. About five minutes into the meal, Chinassa looks up and notices how Frank is chewing with his mouth open and she watches him, disgusted. She watches the chewed up food move all over his mouth, almost pouring out. Frank is oblivious as to how he’s chewing. Chinassa tries to ignore it and go on eating her food, but she has a hard time.

INT. BEDROOM – NIGHT

That night, Frank and Chinassa are in bed sleeping. Frank tosses and turns trying to get comfortable but it’s not working. He finally wakes up and notices that Chinassa is sleeping right under him. He lightly pushes her to her side of the bed and tries to go back to sleep. A few moments later, Chinassa falls right back under him. Frank gives up and just lays there woke.

INT. DINING – MORNING

Both Frank and Chinassa are ready for work sitting at the dining table eating breakfast. Chinassa goes over some things on her laptop as Frank grazes the newspaper. Frank then picks up his mug and annoyingly slurps his beverage. Chinassa stares at him over her computer. Frank puts his beverage down.

A few moments later, Chinassa begins tapping her pen on the table. Frank looks up from reading the paper and eyes Chinassa.

After a few seconds of listening to her pen, Frank can’t take it anymore.

FRANK

I think I better get to work.

Chinassa stops tapping and looks up. Frank gets up and takes one last slurp of his beverage. Chinassa looks at him disgusted.

CHINASSA

Yeah, me too.

Chinassa gets up. Both annoyed with each other, they gather their things and give each other a kiss and head out the door.

INT. UCHE’S OFFICE

Uche sits behind his desk listening to Frank rant about Chinassa.

FRANK

…I mean, does she have to sleep that close to me? The bed is big enough for both of us to have our space. And what is with this weird tapping thing she does? I mean, it’s like drilling and it drives me crazy…

Frank finally finishes and Uche is just staring at him, grinning.

FRANK (CONT’D)

Don’t even say it.

UCHE

Say what?

FRANK

Come on, man. I don’t need to hear that right now.

UCHE

I don’t know what you’re talking about. What could I possibly say in a situation like this? Oh, wait, I know. (beat) I told you so.

FRANK

I told you not to say it.

UCHE

I had to. Man, I told you, there is no such thing as a perfect woman.

FRANK

I mean, everyone does little things that annoy other people. That’s normal.

UCHE

Look, there isn’t anything normal about tapping.

Frank walks out of Uche’s office shaking his head.

UCHE

Don’t ignore the signs, Frank. They’re right in front of you.

INT. CHINASSA’S OFFICE

Chinassa is on the phone talking to Nnenna.

CHINASSA

(into phone)

Yes, girl. Chews with his mouth wide open. He looks like a garbage truck.

Cynthia comes in and sets some files on her desk.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

Thank you.

(into phone)

What else? He slurps his beverage. (beat) That is not cute, Nnenna. It’s disgusting.

Chinassa signs some papers and looks through the files on her desk.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

(into phone)

Maybe I’m just making a big deal about it? Something was bound to annoy me about him.

Chinassa gathers the files and papers she just signed.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

(into phone)

Listen girl, I have to go to a meeting. So, I’m going to call you tonight. (beat) Bye.

Chinassa hangs up her phone and rushes out of her office.

INT. BEDROOM – NIGHT

Frank is in bed clipping his toenails.

FRANK

So, babe, I have some new ideas to lock down the account.

CHINASSA (O.S.)

That’s great. I have some new projections to show you that I think will help move us along to signing a contract.

Chinassa comes out of the bathroom in her robe. She notices what Frank is doing and stops in her tracks and her mouth drops.

A nail comes flying (in slow motion) at Chinassa, and as it’s about entering her open mouth she ducks out of the way.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

What are you doing?

Frank looks up and then looks back down at his feet.

FRANK

Oh, don’t worry. I’ll be done in a minute.

Chinassa tries not to gag as she runs back into the bathroom.

Frank shrugs his shoulders and brushes his toenails off the bed and onto the floor.

INT. BATHROOM

Chinassa is sitting on the toilet talking on her cell phone and she’s furious.

CHINASSA

(into phone)

Girl, he is out there clipping his toenails. (beat) Yes, he has his nasty ass toes all out.

Chinassa goes over to the door and cracks it open and looks out. Frank is biting one of his toenails. Chinassa cringes and shuts the door.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

(into phone)

He’s probably slicing up the sheets with those claws.

Chinassa breathes in and out.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

(into phone)

Okay, let me calm down. It’s no big deal. Alright, I’ll see you at the office tomorrow.

Chinassa hangs up the phone and prepares to go back into the bedroom.

INT. BEDROOM

Frank is in the bed watching television when Chinassa comes back out with cream all over her face. Frank’s eyes never leaves the television.

FRANK

It’s about time, babe. I thought you were never going to come out.

As Chinassa walks to the bed, she steps on a toenail.

CHINASSA

Ow.

FRANK

You okay?

CHINASSA

Yeah, I just stepped on something.

FRANK

(nonchalant)

Be careful.

Chinassa crawls into bed. Frank turns off the television and turns to curl up to Chinassa when he notices the cream on her face and is startled. He jumps back.

FRANK (CONT’D)

Jesus!

CHINASSA

What?

FRANK

What is that?

CHINASSA

What is what?

FRANK

That all over your face?

CHINASSA

It’s just a little cream.

FRANK

Little? That’s a whole lot of cream.

Chinassa laughs and turns the lights off.

CHINASSA

Go to sleep, Frank. Sweet dreams.

FRANK

(to himself)

I might have nightmares now.

Frank looks frightened as he distances himself away from Chinassa, putting a pillow in between them.

INT. KITCHEN – MORNING

Frank and Uche come in talking and laughing with their work out clothes all drenched in sweat. Frank gets two bottles of water and tosses one to Uche. They head towards the living room.

INT. LIVING ROOM

Frank and Uche plop down on the couch and Frank continues to tell Uche about last night.

FRANK

I mean, it was all over her face. Now who wants to go to bed next to that?

UCHE

You know what you should do?

FRANK

What?

UCHE

Put it in the agreement.

FRANK

Put what in the agreement?

UCHE

That she can’t wear that cream face mask anymore.

FRANK

Are you serious?

UCHE

You said it yourself, you two can put anything in there and the other has to agree.

FRANK

But it’s just cream.

UCHE

No, it’s not just cream. It’s like a sex shield. Women use that face shit because they know men won’t come near them for sex.

Frank thinks for a moment then pulls out his cell phone and dials.

FRANK (CONT’D)

(into phone)

Gbenga . I’d like to set up a meeting if you’re available. (beat) Great. I’ll see you then.

Frank hangs up his phone.

UCHE

There you go.

Frank gets up to go get dressed.

INT. CHINASSA’S OFFICE

Chinassa and Nnenna are talking when Cynthia comes in with a phone.

CYNTHIA

Your lawyer is on the line.

CHINASSA

Thank you, Cynthia.

Cynthia leaves and Chinassa picks up the phone.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

(into phone)

Hey, Anita. What’s going on?

Chinassa sits on the phone listening while Nnenna waits. After a few moments, Chinassa starts laughing.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

(into phone)

You’ve got to be kidding me?

NNENNA

What is it?

Chinassa holds up her hand for Nnenna to hold on.

CHINASSA

(into phone)

Well, thanks Anita. I’ll see you next week.

Chinassa hangs up the phone and Nnenna can barely stand it.

NNENNA

What? What happened?

CHINASSA

Frank has taken it upon himself to add a few more things to our agreement.

NNENNA

Yeah, right.

CHINASSA

No, I’m serious. He’s meeting with his lawyer next week.

NNENNA

Well, what did he add?

CHINASSA

I don’t know. But I’m going to find out.

NNENNA

Oh, this is getting good.

Nnenna watches Chinassa with excitement.

INT. FRANK’S OFFICE

Frank is reading a text and laughing when Uche comes in.

UCHE

What’s so funny?

FRANK

Chinassa found out that I spoke to my lawyer.

UCHE

So, she knows you’re putting in some more stipulations for her to follow?

FRANK

Oh, yeah. She knows. And she spoke with her lawyer, also.

UCHE

Which means–

FRANK

Which means, she’s adding in some commands herself.

Uche laughs.

UCHE

You know you’ve started a war, right?

Frank stares at his computer screen, smirking.

FRANK

Yeah. And I’m ready to fight.

Uche shakes his head.

INT. DINING

Frank is sitting at the dining table waiting in the dark when Chinassa comes in from work. She sets her briefcase on the counter and notices Frank. She jumps a little.

CHINASSA

Baby, you scared me.

FRANK

Did I?

CHINASSA

Yes, and why are you sitting in the dark?

FRANK

I’ve been waiting for you to get home.

Chinassa turns on the light.

CHINASSA

Well, I’m home.

Frank holds up a piece of paper.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

What is that?

FRANK

It’s a revised copy of the agreement.

CHINASSA

What? I thought you weren’t meeting with your lawyer until next week.

FRANK

I know you thought I wasn’t meeting with my lawyer until next week. That’s why I had Gbenga mail me a new copy.

Frank gets up and walks over to Chinassa and gets in her face.

CHINASSA

I can’t believe you would go behind my back.

FRANK

Behind your back, huh?

Frank goes over to the counter and goes through Chinassa’s briefcase.

CHINASSA

What are you doing?

FRANK

Just looking for something.

CHINASSA

Looking for what?

Frank pulls out a piece of paper.

FRANK

Looking for this.

CHINASSA

Give me that.

FRANK

Could this be your new copy of the agreement, with things you added in. Who went behind whose back now?

CHINASSA

I knew you were going to pull something, so I had Anita mail me a copy, too.

Chinassa snatches her copy of the agreement from Frank.

Frank and Chinassa just stand there for a few moments.

FRANK

So, what did you put in your copy?

CHINASSA

You show me yours first.

FRANK

Fine. We’ll, switch and look at them at the same time.

CHINASSA

Fine.

FRANK

Fine.

Frank and Chinassa slowly switch copies and begin reading them.

Chinassa’s eyes grow wide.

CHINASSA

I have to sleep at least two feet away from you unless permitted otherwise.

FRANK

Sometimes I need my space.

CHINASSA

Ugh!

FRANK

And I have to clip my toenails in the backyard.

CHINASSA

I don’t want to step on one again. Those things hurt.

Frank starts laughing and after a beat, Chinassa joins him.

FRANK

This is so ridiculous.

CHINASSA

I can’t believe us.

FRANK

We’re both acting crazy.

CHINASSA

Yeah, we are.

FRANK

I’m going to call Gbenga and have him cancel this new agreement.

CHINASSA

Yeah, I’m going to call Anita.

Chinassa gets ready to turn when she looks down at the agreement and reads something.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

Wait a minute.

FRANK

What?

CHINASSA

What is this?

(reading)

Chinassa has a neurotic tapping problem. She should see someone about it!

Frank gets a little frightened as Chinassa comes towards him.

FRANK

Oh, that was just a suggestion.

CHINASSA

You called me neurotic.

Frank laughs nervously.

FRANK

Yeah, but that’s neurotic in a sexy way.

CHINASSA

This is not funny.

FRANK

I’m sorry, but it annoys me.

CHINASSA

What annoys you?

FRANK

The way you tap your pen on stuff.

CHINASSA

What do you mean the way I tap my pen on stuff?

FRANK

Just forget it.

CHINASSA

No, I’m not going to forget. Tell me. Tell me how I annoy you.

Frank sighs.

FRANK

You tap your pen very rapidly on stuff. Like, on your computer.

CHINASSA

That annoys you?

FRANK

A little.

CHINASSA

A little, huh? Well, you want to know what annoys me about you?

FRANK

Come on, Chinassa. Don’t make things up because you’re mad at me.

CHINASSA

Oh, I’m not making anything up. It’s in the agreement.

Frank quickly looks down at the agreement and scans through it.

FRANK

The way I slurp my beverage?

CHINASSA

Yes.

FRANK

That’s what annoys you?

CHINASSA

Yes, very much.

FRANK

Okay, I think you’re being a little petty.

CHINASSA

And you think my tapping isn’t petty?

FRANK

That’s a serious problem that people have gotten help for.

Chinassa just stands there staring at Frank. She grabs her things off the counter.

CHINASSA

You are unbelievable.

Chinassa storms out the dining area, leaving Frank standing there.

INT. BEDROOM

Frank follows Chinassa into the bedroom. She begins changing her clothes.

FRANK

You know, you’re not exactly innocent in this.

CHINASSA

Whatever.

FRANK

My slurping really bothers you?

CHINASSA

Yes, you slurp your beverage every morning as if you were sucking it through a straw, only there is no straw.

FRANK

That hurts.

Chinassa is walking back and forth between the room and the closet. She steps on something that makes her double over.

She gets to the bed and pulls a toenail out of her foot.

CHINASSA

No, this hurts.

FRANK

What is that?

CHINASSA

Your toenail. Your toenails are everywhere. It’s disgusting.

FRANK

Oh, please. They’re just toenails.

Chinassa throws the toenail at Frank.

FRANK (CONT’D)

Ow.

CHINASSA

See.

FRANK

That’s nothing compared to your tapping. Tap, tap… tap, tap.

CHINASSA

Tapping, huh? And what about your slurping?

Chinassa imitates Frank’s slurping.

FRANK

So, you want to play like that? You know this is war.

CHINASSA

Not yet.

Chinassa grabs her copy of the agreement, goes to desk and writes something on it in pencil. She hands it to Frank and then goes back into the closet.

FRANK

(reading)

When Frank and Chinassa have a fight, Frank must sleep on the couch.

Frank looks up just as Chinassa walks out of the closet. She has a blanket and pillow in her hand and she hands them to Frank. He grabs them and reluctantly leaves the room.

MONTAGE:

INT. CHINASSA’S OFFICE

Chinassa is sitting at her desk talking on the phone when she looks down at her cell phone. She reads the text message and smiles an evil smile.

CUT TO:

INT. BEDROOM

Frank and Chinassa are getting ready to go to bed. Chinassa tries to snuggle up next to Frank, but he holds out the agreement. Chinassa backs off and goes to her side of the bed.

CUT TO:

INT. GYM

Frank is just finishing up working out. He looks into his gym bag and takes his cell phone out. He looks at it reading the text message. He smiles the same evil smile that Chinassa had.

CUT TO:

INT. BEDROOM/BATHROOM

Frank comes out the bathroom and Chinassa is standing there, holding up the agreement. Frank goes back into the bathroom and puts the toilet seat back down.

CUT TO:

INT. DINING

Frank is sitting at the table eating dinner. He’s smiling, while Chinassa is at the sink, washing a pile of dirty dishes. She looks over at him and he holds up the agreement.

CUT TO:

EXT. BACKYARD

Frank is clipping his toenails while Chinassa stands behind him watching and holding the agreement.

CUT TO:

INT. CHINASSA’S OFFICE

Chinassa and Anita are going over more things to add to the agreement.

CUT TO:

INT. BEDROOM

Chinassa is posting up copies of the agreement everywhere.

CUT TO:

INT. KITCHEN

Chinassa tapes a copy of the agreement on the refrigerator and the cabinets.

CUT TO:

INT. FRANK’S OFFICE

Frank and Gbenga are talking. Frank lists more things to add while Gbenga frantically writes them down.

CUT TO:

INT. BEDROOM

Frank goes through the room and puts his copies up over Chinassa’s.

CUT TO:

INT. KITCHEN

Frank posts his copies over Chinassa’s.

CUT TO:

INT. CHINASSA’S OFFICE

Chinassa speedily types on her computer and then prints the agreement. She takes it off the printer and then puts it through the fax machine. She folds her arms, satisfied.

CUT TO:

INT. FRANK’S OFFICE

Frank walks over to his fax machine and looks at the agreement that just came through. He goes over to his desk and crosses something out. He writes over it and then puts it back through the fax machine. He stands there with his arms folded, satisfied.

CUT TO:

INT. BATHROOM

It’s the middle of the night and Chinassa is sitting on the toilet on the phone waiting.

CUT TO:

INT. ANITA’S BEDROOM

Anita wakes up and looks at her clock. It read 2:45 a.m. She turns on the light and looks at her cell phone. It’s Chinassa. Anita ignores the call.

CUT TO:

INT. BATHROOM

Chinassa is sitting and waiting for Anita to pick up. She peeks out into the bedroom to check on Frank.

CUT TO:

INT. KITCHEN

Frank is in his pajamas on the phone talking.

CUT TO:

INT. GBENGA’S BEDROOM

Gbenga is on the phone listening to Frank rattle on about the agreement. After a few more moments of listening, Gbenga hangs up on Frank.

CUT TO:

INT. KITCHEN

Frank just stares at the phone.

CUT TO:

INT. BEDROOM

Frank sneaks back into the bed and slowly gets in next to Chinassa. He looks over to see if she’s sleeping and then turns over to go to sleep. Chinassa peeks over her shoulder and then turns back over.

END OF MONTAGE

INT. CHINASSA’S OFFICE

Chinassa is marking up the agreement. It’s covered in red pen and Chinassa is highlighting sections on it. Nnenna has her head on Chinassa’s desk as Chinassa rants.

CHINASSA

I am the one who put in that whoever cooks, the other does the dishes and do you know that he used every dish in the house. How dare he?

Chinassa continues to mark the agreement.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

So, let’s see what he does when he sees the new agreement. I can’t wait.

Chinassa looks up noticing that Nnenna still has her head down.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

Nnenna, are you listening to me?

Nnenna quickly sits up.

NNENNA

Yes.

CHINASSA

No, you’re not.

NNENNA

Yes, I am.

CHINASSA

Then what did I say?

NNENNA

You said you had to wash him in the dishwasher.

CHINASSA

That is not what I said. I said–

NNENNA

I don’t care. I’m am tired of listening to you go on about this stupid agreement. Both of you are acting like children.

CHINASSA

Well he started it.

Just then Cynthia sticks her head in.

CYNTHIA

Anita on the line.

Cynthia sticks her head back out and Chinassa picks up the phone.

CHINASSA

(into phone)

Hey, Anita. What you got? (beat) Okay, I’ll be there.

Chinassa hangs up the phone, excited.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

That was Anita and she wants to meet with me.

NNENNA

For what?

CHINASSA

She didn’t say. But I got to finish this.

Chinassa goes back to marking up the agreement.

NNENNA

You know what, I’m going to leave you and your agreement alone.

Chinassa pays Nnenna no attention.

CHINASSA

Alright, girl. I’ll call you later.

Nnenna gets up and gives Chinassa a worried look and leaves.

INT. FRANK’S OFFICE

Frank is typing on his computer while Uche is lying on his couch.

FRANK

And then she put in that I have to clip my toenails in the backyard.

UCHE

Why would she make you do that?

FRANK

Because she’s stepped on one or two?

UCHE

Those things do hurt.

FRANK

What? Now you’re on her side?

UCHE

I’m not on anybody’s side. I think you both have taken this agreement too far.

FRANK

What do you mean?

UCHE

I mean, are you sure the two of you are even ready to get married?

FRANK

Of course we are. We just have to get this thing straight, so everything will be perfect.

Uche just shakes his head just as Mr. Dibua walks in.

  1. DIBUA

Frank, can I speak with you out here?

FRANK

Sure, Mr. Dibua.

Frank gets up and follows Mr. Dibua out into the hall.

INT. HALLWAY

Mr. Dibua pulls Frank a little bit down the hall.

  1. DIBUA

I’m pulling you and Chinassa off the account.

FRANK

What?

  1. DIBUA

You’re just not focused the way I need you to be.

FRANK

Mr. Dibua, Chinassa and I can handle this.

  1. DIBUA

You have a lot going on right now. So, I’m going to let Thomas and James takeover.

Frank puts his head down, feeling disappointed.

  1. DIBUA (CONT’D)

Don’t worry, you’re still my number one guy. You just have to be a team player on this one.

FRANK

I understand.

Mr. Dibua walks away and Frank sulks back to his office.

INT. FRANK’S OFFICE

As Frank comes back into his office and Uche jumps from in front of the door, where he was listening.

UCHE

Tough break, man. You alright?

FRANK

Yeah, it’s cool. Now, I can focus more on the agreement.

UCHE

Are you serious? You just lost one of the biggest accounts and you’re still worried about the agreement?

Just then Frank’s cell phone rings and he answers it. Uche shakes his head and leaves while Frank is talking.

FRANK (CONT’D)

(into phone)

Hey, Gbenga .(beat) Yeah, I can meet you. I’ll see you soon.

Frank hangs up the phone.

INT. CONFERENCE ROOM

Frank, Chinassa and their lawyers are in the room meeting. Frank and Chinassa are staring each other down and not speaking.

GBENGA

Look, we have got to settle this.

ANITA

You two are driving us crazy as your lawyers. Calling us all times of the night.

FRANK

I knew you were calling her when you were in the bathroom.

CHINASSA

So? You were doing the same thing.

GBENGA

Look, this agreement was not supposed to get this serious.

CHINASSA

Well, it wouldn’t have gotten this serious if Frank didn’t have a new agreement put out.

FRANK

Excuse me, you had a new one put out, too. Talking about my slurping and my toenails.

CHINASSA

Oh, please. Those sharp things almost killed me.

Frank and Chinassa begin arguing.

ANITA

Stop it. Are you listening to yourselves? You have taken this too far.

GBENGA

So, as your lawyers, we are suggesting that you two attend a pre-marriage course.

FRANK/CHINASSA

What?

ANITA

You have issues that you need to work on. And before we sign your agreements, you need to get help.

FRANK

I don’t really think this is necessary.

Anita and Gbenga both pull out all the different copies of the agreements and spreads them out on the table.

ANITA

Oh, yes it is.

GBENGA

We’ve arranged special classes for you guys.

ANITA

And your first session is tomorrow morning. Don’t be late.

Frank and Chinassa go back to staring each other down.

INT. MR OKONOFUA’S OFFICE

Mr Okonofua takes a seat in a chair. Frank and Chinassa sit on the couch across from Mr Okonofua. Mr Okonofua holds a notepad and a pen.

MR OKONOFUA

I think the two of you are so wrapped up in the idea of a perfect mate, you tried to force it on each other.

FRANK

Everything is perfect between us.

MR OKONOFUA

See that’s just it, no one is perfect. And the sooner you two realize that, the better this marriage is going to be. The way you two are going, this can cause major problems down the road.

CHINASSA

Like what?

A beat.

FRANK

Like losing a major account at work.

CHINASSA

What?

FRANK

I was going to tell you. Mr. Dibua took the account away from us. He said we weren’t focused.

CHINASSA

I can’t believe this.

MR OKONOFUA

You two were so concerned with making each other perfect, you forgot about what’s really important.

Mr Okonofua writes down some more notes.

FRANK

So, what do we do now?

MR OKONOFUA

First of all, stop trying to change each other and except each other for who you are.

Mr Okonofua walks over to her shelves and picks up a few books and then hands them to Chinassa and Frank.

MR OKONOFUA (CONT’D)

Here, read these.

FRANK

Books?

CHINASSA

Frank. Just listen.

MR OKONOFUA

No book can tell you how to have a successful marriage, but it can give you guidelines on what to work on.

CHINASSA

And this will help us?

MR OKONOFUA

It’ll get you started. I would like us to have ongoing classes until you get married.

Mr Okonofua smiles .

MR OKONOFUA

I look forward to meeting with you two again.

INT. BEDROOM – NIGHT

Frank and Chinassa are on the bed which is covered with all the books they got from Mr Okonofua and many versions of their prenuptial agreement. Both Frank and Chinassa are writing their final lists.

FRANK

You think this is a good idea?

CHINASSA

You heard Mr Okonofua, we have to stop focusing on trying to make each other perfect.

FRANK

So, writing down our flaws is going to help us?

CHINASSA

Yes. We need to accept each other as we are. Mr Okonofua said that’s the only way our marriage is going to work.

FRANK

Alright, but I have to tell you, I’m a little nervous.

CHINASSA

Baby, don’t worry. I’m not going to judge you by your list.

FRANK

No. I’m nervous about what you’re writing over there.

Chinassa shoots Frank a look.

CHINASSA

Oh, really? You’re nervous about my list?

FRANK

Yeah, there’s no telling what kind of issues you’re putting down.

CHINASSA

Whatever.

Chinassa finished writing her list.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

I’m finished.

FRANK

Yeah, me too.

CHINASSA

Alright, let’s switch.

Frank and Chinassa switch lists and begin reading. After a few moments of reading, the mood changes.

FRANK

(shocked)

Wow!

CHINASSA

Wow, what?

FRANK

Nothing.

CHINASSA

No, what is it?

FRANK

This is a pretty big list.

CHINASSA

Yeah, so is yours.

FRANK

Ummm… is number seven true?

Chinassa leans over as Frank points.

CHINASSA

Yes.

Frank gets a worried look on his face.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

What about your number 12?

FRANK

What about it?

CHINASSA

Do you really do that?

FRANK

Hey, you said you wouldn’t judge me.

CHINASSA

This is a lot of stuff, Frank.

FRANK

You got a lot of crazy things on here, too.

CHINASSA

Crazy? So, you think I’m crazy?

FRANK

No, I’m just saying…

CHINASSA

You’re saying that I’m crazy.

FRANK

See, I knew this was a bad idea.

CHINASSA

So, this is my fault?

FRANK

Well, it was your idea.

CHINASSA

You know what, Frank? You’re nobody’s Mr. Perfect according to this list.

FRANK

Oh, really?

CHINASSA

Yes, really.

Frank and Chinassa sit for a moment and think.

FRANK

I guess we don’t know as much about each other as we thought.

CHINASSA

I guess we don’t.

FRANK

And maybe we rushed into this thing too fast.

CHINASSA

Yeah, maybe we did.

FRANK

Maybe we should call the engagement off.

Chinassa tries to hold back tears.

CHINASSA

Maybe we should.

Frank grabs a blanket and a pillow, walks past a crying Chinassa and leaves the room.

INT. LIVING ROOM – MORNING

The house is quiet and dark. Nnenna walks through the living room and sees the pillow and blanket still on the couch.

NNENNA

(calling out)

Chinassa, I know you’re here.

Nnenna continues to the dining.

Nnenna slowly walks to the dining. She sees Chinassa’s briefcase and her mug sitting on the table.

NNENNA

(calling out)

I’ve been calling you all morning.

INT. BEDROOM – MOMENTS LATER

The bedroom is a mess and clothes and used tissues are everywhere. Nnenna knocks on the door, but no response. The door slowly opens and Nnenna creeps in.

NNENNA

Chinassa. Are you in here?

Nnenna notices movement in the bed. Nnenna comes in the room and moves some tissues out the way. She takes a seat on the bed.

NNENNA (CONT’D)

I got worried when you didn’t come to work and you weren’t answering the phone.

CHINASSA

I’m fine.

NNENNA

No, you’re not.

Chinassa gets up from under the covers and sits up.

CHINASSA

We went to see a marriage class.

NNENNA

Really? Did it help?

CHINASSA

No. If anything it made everything worse.

NNENNA

What happened?

Chinassa grabs the list of flaws she and Frank made the night before.

CHINASSA

We made a list of all our faults and we got into an argument.

NNENNA

Then what happened?

CHINASSA

Frank said that we didn’t know as much about each other as we thought and that we should call off the engagement.

NNENNA

And then what?

CHINASSA

I agreed and he went to go sleep on the couch.

NNENNA

Yeah, I noticed that. (beat) Sweetheart, you know I’m not one to say I told you so–

Chinassa gets up and goes to the bathroom and returns with more tissues.

CHINASSA

But everything was perfect.

NNENNA

No, it wasn’t. You just wanted it to be.

Nnenna pulls Chinassa to her and let’s her cry on her shoulder.

INT. FRANK’S OFFICE

Frank is slouching in his chair behind his desk. He doesn’t have on a suit jacket and his tie is undone. Uche is standing in the doorway.

UCHE

Are you serious? Why would you call the engagement off?

FRANK

We realized we were moving too fast.

UCHE

I could have told you that. In fact, I think I did tell you that.

FRANK

We realized that we didn’t know that much about each other.

UCHE

I think I told you that too.

FRANK

Basically, we realized that other one isn’t as perfect as we thought.

UCHE

Now, I did tell you that.

FRANK

Uche.

UCHE

Sorry.

FRANK

We even went to a marriage class.

UCHE

Like I tried to tell you before, no one is perfect.

FRANK

Is there a point to your speech?

UCHE

My point is, you love this woman. No, she’s not perfect, but nothing in life is.

FRANK

So, what do I do?

UCHE

You still want to marry her, right?

FRANK

Of course.

UCHE

Then you can’t let one fight stop you.

As Uche leaves, Frank ponders Uche’s last statement.

MONTAGE:

Frank talks on the phone for a few moments and then hangs up. He grabs his jackets and runs out of his office.

INT. FRANK’S CAR

Frank is speeding down the street talking on his cell phone.

INT. RESTARAUNT

Frank meets with Gbenga and Anita. He speaks with them and pulls out some papers and shows them some things. Gbenga and Anita give him some paper work.

INT. MR OKONOFUA’S OFFICE

Frank is meeting with Mr Okonofua. They’re looking at some books and Frank is taking notes while Mr Okonofua talks to him.

INT. FRANK’S OFFICE

Frank is back in his office, frantically typing on his computer. After a few moments, Frank receives an email. He prints out whatever he was typing on the computer, prints out the email he received and once again, runs out of the office.

END OF MONTAGE

INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT

Frank rushes into the living room. Chinassa is lying on the couch watching television. Frank grabs the remote from Chinassa and turns the television off.

CHINASSA

Frank, what are you doing?

FRANK

Here.

Frank hands Chinassa an envelope.

CHINASSA

What is this?

FRANK

Just open it.

Chinassa sits up and opens the envelope and pulls out a document.

CHINASSA

What is it?

FRANK

It’s our prenup agreement.

CHINASSA

Frank, I don’t want to get into this again.

FRANK

Just read it.

CHINASSA

All we’re going to do is fight.

FRANK

No we’re not. Just please, read it.

Chinassa proceeds to read the agreement.

Frank pulls out his own copy of the agreement.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

(reading)

Frank promises to love Chinassa for who she is and not by her faults but by her strengths.

FRANK

(reading)

Frank and Chinassa promise to talk out their problems and not fight with each other.

CHINASSA

(reading)

We promise to put aside our petty differences and realize that the other is not perfect and to make this marriage work, we have to work together.

Chinassa looks up at Frank.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

Our marriage?

Frank grabs the agreement out of Chinassa’s hand and rips it up. Frank then gets down on one knee.

FRANK

Chinassa, will you marry me… again?

CHINASSA

(excited)

Yes!

Chinassa smiles and Frank gets up, grabs her and kisses her.

FADE TO BLACK.

TITLE OVER: TWO YEARS LATER

FADE FROM BLACK

INT. LIVING ROOM

Frank and Chinassa are cuddled up on the couch, watching television and eating popcorn. Frank shifts a little.

CHINASSA

What’s wrong?

FRANK

My shoulder’s a little stiff. I could use a massage.

Frank looks over at Chinassa who pays him no attention. Frank shifts a little more.

Frank stares at Chinassa. She finally looks over at him.

CHINASSA

What?

FRANK

I said, I could use a massage.

CHINASSA

So.

FRANK

So could you get on your job?

CHINASSA

What did you say?

FRANK

Could you get on your job and give me a massage?

CHINASSA

Oh, I think you have lost your mind.

FRANK

You’re supposed to give me a massage.

CHINASSA

What makes you think that?

Frank stares at Chinassa for a moment.

FRANK

See, I knew this was going to happen.

Frank runs into the kitchen and returns with a document.

CHINASSA

What the hell is that?

FRANK

It’s a copy of one of our old agreements.

CHINASSA

You kept one?

FRANK

Yeah, I knew it would come in handy. See, it says right here in section 9. Chinassa must give Frank a massage whenever he wants.

CHINASSA

You’ve got be kidding me?

FRANK

Nope, it says it right here.

CHINASSA

Okay, so this is how you want to play, huh?

Chinassa runs upstairs and then returns with her document.

CHINASSA (CONT’D)

Well, that’s not what it says in my agreement.

FRANK

I can’t believe you have that.

CHINASSA

Well, you have one. And mine says something different.

FRANK

That’s not even the right version.

They get into a playful argument. After a few moments of arguing, a baby begins crying.

CHINASSA

See, you woke up Frank, Jr.

FRANK

I did not. You did. You’re the loud one. I think you should go change him.

CHINASSA

Why me?

FRANK

Because it’s Tuesday.

CHINASSA

What?

Frank grabs a pen and starts writing on his agreement.

FRANK

Yeah, from now on, you change and feed Frank, Jr. on Tuesdays.

CHINASSA

If that’s the case, then you have to do it the rest of the week.

Chinassa grabs herself a pen and begins writing on her own agreement.

FRANK

That’s ridiculous. Okay, fine, you have to wash all the bottles.

CHINASSA

Then you have to take out all the dirty diapers.

Frank, Jr. continues to cry as Frank and Chinassa continue to playfully write on their agreements and argue.

FADE TO BLACK

THE END